Sunday, 26 January 2020

Extracts from my diary

I wanted to share a few extracts from diary from the last week.  My project moves forward and even though I do not know what the end result will be exactly yet.  The diary is coming along.  I have had moments of despair but also some moments of joy! 

Day One
I was considering at first why I should do this as I always consider diaries slightly dangerous.  I think it was in one of Gautier's books where a woman's affair was discovered through her letters and diary and the man did not understand why she had not burnt all of this as it is evidence of the infidelity.  I think, like my last project, there is an element of remembering as I often think time passes and I can't recall the details of all the days.

The day started with us (my partner and I) in bed looking at the clouds, or should I say he was looking at the clouds and considering them pretty.  Pretty clouds over Leicester he said.  I was contemplating other things and have a much less romantic view of clouds and was thinking it was quite probable that the cloud was actually a smoggy toxic cloud over Leicester being that Leicester is one of the most polluted cities in England.  However, I didn't say this and said instead that the cloud looked like a long-nosed very long shark.  Funnily enough, the image of the cloud shark did stay with me throughout the day.

Day Four

Thursday - another day, and work commences and I am embroiled and can not extract myself from people all day long. The highlight of the day was a photography class. Every time I pick up my camera (any camera) it is a feeling of being at home. I am at once, calm and I have everything I need. Just holding the camera brings me joy and then when I begin to take the pictures I still love the feeling of not knowing whether the shoot will be good, but always know I will find something exciting within it. Even if the pictures are not what I expected they can be surprising and I will find pure joy in small detail. 

Day Seven 
Finally, the sun appeared and this lifted my mood no end - My flat has huge windows and when the sun comes in it really is bright and lovely inside.  I look down on the city of Leicester and on a Sunday morning it is beautifully quiet - the only sound is usually the cleaning truck that comes round to clean up Saturday nights debris.  My son went off to football fairly early and so I have peace, a good cup of coffee and a little time to think....

At present this seems random however I do feel themes and ideas will emerge for the final piece of work and it has helped me to reflect more on the days - in modern terms it ia a mindful experience!

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